Dear Madeleine,
I am an experienced manager. I really thought I was capable and prepared to deal with pretty much anything that shows up, but right now I am feeling a bit at loose ends.
Our global manufacturing company is going through relentless change, which is normal. But the constant changes in the news about tariffs is causing chaos. I am usually able to provide clarity about our strategy and how it affects each person’s day-to-day job, but lately it has been a lot of “Just do your best—we have to wait and see.”
For the past couple of months, my regular one-on-one meetings have been mostly helping people manage their feelings of overwhelm—to the degree that I am sick and tired of the word overwhelm. It is hard not to roll my eyes when the first thing people say when we meet is “I am feeling totally overwhelmed.” I have run out of ways to help people in that state, partially because I feel the same way myself.
I would be grateful for any ideas you might have for me.
Over the Overwhelm
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Dear Over the Overwhelm,
You are not alone. Many very experienced managers are struggling right now. I think it is because life is complicated even when all is going well. So when the world seems out of control and our businesses face relentless challenges due to uncertainty, our sense of stability can be dramatically impacted.
The usual tools we use in normal times are not helping as they have in the past:
- Prioritizing responsibilities
- Basic time and task management techniques such as breaking down tasks into smaller steps and blocking out time to accomplish tasks that require focus
- Establishing proper boundaries where appropriate
- Learning and using mindfulness or meditation tools
- Optimizing the work environment by de-cluttering and using apps to stay organized
- Implementing recovery and reset rituals such as micro-breaks and after-work activities that move people away from their screens
It sounds as if you offer an empathetic ear by allowing people to vent and process. You are right to curb your urge to roll your eyes, although that response might be an indication that you could use an empathetic ear yourself.
Working with clients, I have noticed that it isn’t just work that contributes to people feeling at the end of their rope. It is the pile-up of difficult life circumstances as well. If this is the case, you might introduce the Wheel of Life exercise, which can help people identify all the different aspects of their lives that are contributing to their feeling so out of whack. The Wheel of Life tool is a classic coaching tool that has been around forever—if you Google it, you will find multiple explanations and examples.
You can also use classic coaching questions to help your people gain some clarity and get the help they need. Examples are:
- “What kind of support would be most helpful—emotional, logistical, or tactical?”
- “What’s one thing you can do right now that would make today feel a bit more manageable?”
- “What’s your biggest energy drainer right now?”
In addition, you can challenge people, albeit kindly, in a few ways:
- To be mindful of the language they are using to describe how they are feeling. The more we repeat things, the more real they become. People who are truly overwhelmed have been so swept away by events that they cannot function normally. If a person is still functioning, “I am overwhelmed” might be better expressed as “The noise and complexity feel like a lot right now.”
- To be more kind and compassionate with themselves and suspend any judgment they might have about how they feel. It might be helpful for a person who is saying “I should be handling all of this better” to re-frame that as “This is a lot to handle and I am doing my best.”
- To recognize the reality that just because it feels like the building is on fire doesn’t mean it is. You all still have jobs, you are all contributing to the success of the organization. Nobody knows what tomorrow will bring, so all there is to do is continue to show up to work and do your best.
You can be a role model for perspective and sanity. The more you take care of yourself, the more compassion and common sense you will have to offer your people. Do whatever you need to do to stay centered. Go for a walk, breathe, do yoga. Stop watching the news. Go play with puppies at an adoption event, or attend a monster truck show. Call your best friend just to say hi. Play golf or bake cookies. Do whatever you can to gain equilibrium yourself and to build enough reserve to be generous.
And finally, remember: as grim as things feel right now, this, too, shall pass.
Love, Madeleine
About Madeleine
Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services as well as a key facilitator of Blanchard’s Leadership Coach Certification course. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.
Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response soon. Please be advised that although she will do her best, Madeleine cannot respond to each letter personally. Letters will be edited for clarity and length.
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